Choice

I believe that a person has the capacity to reinvent their self. There is an old saying, that leopards never change their spots... well, I guess it is good that we are humans, and for the most part, spotless. In the end, I think it all comes down to choice.

Choice is really the one thing that defines us as humans. From a physical and spiritual perspective, we exercise a freedom of choice. While continued decisions along a single vein will undoubtedly adjust one's disposition to favor a specific choice, I do not believe that it completely determines it.

Extreme cases aside, I believe that people can change. And yet, at the same time, I have come to accept that many choose not to. Even those who do decided to make a change in their life, are often the ones that seemed to have it coming if you knew them well enough. Often, this is regarded as having a "good heart", or at least a will to change.

I say that to say this. I dont think a person should ever be judged because of their past. The only thing that you can decide from a person's past is to see what direction their choices have led them, but even then, you would only know of their general disposition. Ultimately, as humans, we are defined by the decisions we make.

In any friendship or relationship, physical or spiritual, I believe it is important to be around people who either make good choices, or who wish to make good choices (however you define good is up to you). Change is just a byproduct of time and patience, but the will to change seems to be inherent.

If you ever want to evaluate your friendships or a relationship, try and figure out whether or not they have a will to change (for better or for worse). More than who they are right then or what their past is... that will to change will tell you a lot about where they are going.

This makes sense if you think about it. Ultimately, you live with that person in the future, not in the past, nor the present.